So my dom and I have been dabbling in denial, but I’m only not allowed to orgasm when she’s not around. How do I tell her I want to be denied during sex too? Tonight is the first time in a week I’ve gotten to see her and we’re going to dinner, I want her to play with me and then take me home and fuck me senseless but not be allowed to orgasm the entire time. What do I say?

You’ve just expressed it beautifully! Be brave and tell her. Send her a message with, ‘So I had this idea that got me all excited, maybe we could try it tonight?’

She’ll come back and ask what it was, and then you tell her exactly what you told me. I’m pretty sure she’ll love the idea but if not you’re only saying what you would like, that’s a great thing. Worst case scenario is she saves it for another time.

As much as it may sometimes feel like it, we dom/mes aren’t mind readers, we want and need you to tell us how to make your fantasies and dreams come true.

So be brave, tell her. OR alternatively, you could send her this post. ‘Wow, I love this idea. It totally wasn’t me who asked this, honestly… Can we do it, can we?