D/s folks with kids, how do you manage this?

  • No bondage, in case we need to react quickly.
  • Plastic coat hangers
  • A thick wooden rod from Home Depot for a thuddy cane-like feel. I should have painted or stained it but if it comes to that, it’s cheap to replace. While you’re there, get two eye-screws and remember the diameter, then drill that size of a hole on either end of the rod, and then when you are able to have reliable privacy, you’ve got a spreader bar. Mine is pretty long so it’s unwieldy to use for caning (it’s more like hitting with a staff!) but the extra mass means more impact for the same speed.
  • Pinching. Rhythmic pinching. 🙂
  • Breath play… It doesn’t need to be heavy, panic inducing, or otherwise sadistic. A hand over the nose and mouth, counting down from ten, release and praise, then repeat, never too long, never tricking or mindfucking, always encouraging, does wonders. I know it’s not spanking or impact play, but sometimes it’s more about submitting to trust, connection, so this might be more satisfying than you’d think.
  • biting/scratching
  • Pussy spanking with a closed first is thuddy and not too loud.

Rule #1 for kinky parents


Add to that some music and you’re good for a lot of it. But seriously, get a lock and 90% of the issues are gone. It means you can never get interrupted without warning.

If you’re at someone else’s home or similar bring a portable lock with you:

(They’re also great for security when travelling) You can get them on Amazon for $20 or so.

If you’re a cheap bastard like me you can even make one from a fork:


But the best bit, for the one you have at home (and sliding bolts are best for this) is you go into the bedroom, reach up to it, make eye contact with her and slide that fucker home and she knows it’s ‘game on’!



PS – @femsubdenial Get some under the bed restraints for bondage, not rope, you can get out of them in 5 seconds, although I personally enjoy the, ‘Mummy’s a bit tied up at the moment sweetheart, what can I do to help?’ conversations.

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