What a great question, and thanks so much for the encouragement! 

So, ruined orgasms… they are a really interesting tool in our denial box of tricks. With guys they are very easy to manage, and the results are much more predictable (he starts ejaculating, you stop rubbing, he dies inside…) WIth girls it’s MUCH less predictable. It can sometimes have little effect and be nearly as good as a normal orgasm, other times it can leave you emotionally distraught and in tears, and it can also make you want to kill someone, which is quite amusing. This doesn’t only vary from woman to woman, but from time to time, but I’ll describe how I recommend doing it from a denial perspective, i.e. to not let you stop being horny but to give you just a taste of an orgasm but none of the fulfilment of it. 

How to ruin a woman’s orgasm

Ideally you want to be ruining a vaginal or g-spot orgasm, as it’s a far more impactful, as you’ll see. If you can’t cum that way, don’t worry, but try to combine clitoral stimulation with penetration to give you a similar effect.

The hornier you are, the better, in my experience, so doing this after a period of edging and denial is perfect. A ruined orgasm is all about the mind fuck, and so be prepared for it to hit you quite hard emotionally too.

There’s very much a build up process you can use to ‘practice’ ruining an orgasm, before you actually do it, and this tends to make it work better in a woman when the time actually comes. So masturbate however you enjoy until you’re getting quite close but not in risk of cumming yet. You want to be using a dildo or vibrating dildo inside you, and optionally fingers or a vibe on your clit. Feel free to leave off the clit stimulation if you can, as it can give a very focused experience, and if you find you like it (sick fucker that you are) you can then try it with both, or just try clit alone.

So, once you’re close as described, give yourself ten deep, hard strokes with the dildo and then immediately pull it out and stop rubbing your clit too. Give your brain a minute to process that, and then get back to it, fucking and rubbing, until you’re closer, and repeat that. Ten strokes, and out, no more contact. You may want to drop the toys, and grab the bed sheets, you may want to put your hands above your head, you may want to stick the dildo in your mouth, whatever takes your fancy, just train yourself to stop, dead.

Keep this going, you want four or five ‘practice runs’ before you go for the real thing. And when you feel you’re ready, just keep going, keep fucking, keep rubbing, faster, harder, as you get closer and closer and then go over that glorious edge and then… PULL it out. STOP rubbing. Feel your poor cunt clench on nothing as it spasms in a phantom orgasm and you scream in frustration. Make sure you relish the true agony of all that pleasure being snatched away from you – it’s brutal, make the most of it.

If your fella is doing this to you then he could give you 20 seconds to experience the full horror of the ruined orgasms and then make you suck his cock (be careful, you might want to bite it off) or even fuck you and cum in you while you’re recovering from it (my bio does warn I’m something of a sadist…)

Alternatively, and more likely, you may want to just be cuddled as he tells you it’s okay, and that one day he will let you cum, adding he likes ruining you so much that it may not be for some time though. Feel free to cry.

Multiple ruins…

Oh and at this point I should add, you can chain ruined orgasms together (sometimes in guys too, which is most unusual compared to normal), so that you get a couple of minutes to recover and then start the fucking and rubbing again and ruin it, again, and again, and again. If you can cope with more than four in a row you are seriously fucked up, congratulations.

I might mix them up, so make the first one vaginal only, second one clit only, then a third with both stimulation. Spice of life and all that…

You can ruin a series of orgasms and then finish on a real one, which wipes away a lot of downside of the ruined ones as it ‘flushes’ the system of the stress build up. But you lose the benefit of keeping her horny. But if you’re like me you might promise a full orgasm and then just whisper, ‘actually, ruin it’ right at the end. But then, I’m a bastard.

The aftermath

Be prepared to feel like shit and to want to kill everyone you meet. Your body is flooded with all kinds of hormones and never gets to properly vent them, it’s some seriously crazy shit. But then, if you’re reading this blog, that may well turn you on. It can take up to 24 hours to return back to normal. 

Usually, and this is the key thing for denial addicts, you’ll be just as horny as you were before, within an hour or two. Yep, you’re fucked.

Despite their horror, a well trained denial slut can be taught to crave being ruined over having full orgasms. That’s seriously fucked up and so hot… and can turn denial sessions into seasons by simply ruining again and again instead of giving orgasms. 

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