Hey Jordan,

All denial questions welcome!!! Let’s see what I can come up with for you and those in a similar situation. A quick trigger warning though, I tend to confront things like dysphoria pretty head on, in the belief that we best tackle our demons by facing them. Running from them just means a lifetime of being chased. So some of what I write below is very much punching it in the face territory. It may be you’re not at a point where it’s helpful, but the honesty of your question suggest you might be. So take what’s good for you, and just discard what isn’t, deal?

So for those unsure of what gender dysphoria is, it’s the (sometimes extreme) discomfort felt due to the disconnect between what you know your gender is and the fact your physical body doesn’t match it (I hope that’s a good description).

So for Jordan as a trans guy, he’s naturally struggling with the fact he doesn’t have a cock and balls when his mind and emotions tell him he should have because that’s what guys have. And in reverse, he’s binding his chest to get rid of the breasts that just shouldn’t be there. (Just to put it in plain English.)

Okay, so Jordan, as you’re more than aware, dysphoria is a tricky thing and all kinds of stuff can trigger it, and lots of things can help too, but they REALLY vary. So if the stuff I suggest doesn’t work for you, that’s totally okay (I’m taking a risk with some of these, I warn you now!).

I personally think it’s really helpful to remember that as unborn babies we ALL start out with women’s genitalia, and for most guys there comes a point where a change is triggered and the clit and ovaries drop down into a cock and balls.

That just didn’t happen for you.

So it’s all there, it’s just hidden away. Your clit is actually the same as a teeny little cock. As you rub it and hump it you’re feeling just what a guy would feel. Maybe you can wank it by putting your fingers and thumb in a circle (all the tips together) and pushing up and down. (This can be an amazing technique for any one btw).

Secondly, you could fantasise about the fact nature did this to you because it knew you were a denial slut, and instead of a big cock to stroke it hid it all away to keep you denied and horny, because that’s how you’re meant to be. (Like I said, this might work for you, but it might not, no problem).

Also maybe have an explore into ‘SPH’ or small penis humiliation captions. Some other guys genuinely have cocks the size of a clit, and the whole idea of having it locked away because it’s not big enough might just be a turn on for you as you can identify with that.

Other fantasies might help create a context for your situation that again just makes it fun to get off on. The idea that magic has somehow transformed you, that it’s deliberate you’ve been trapped inside a woman’s body just to deny you, that could be hot too (or it could be totally unhelpful, and that’s okay!).

There’s some REALLY good hentai on that theme if you do like it. Have a look at the tg transformation tag as a starting point.

Again, it might be helpful to know that as a denial dom, I find your situation somewhat alluring. The idea of you trapped inside that body, the female form that I find so beautiful, but all the desires of a man. Fucking you in the arse because that’s how male subs are used, making you suck my cock while I tease you about not having your own to pleasure. The worst thing though, sometimes I’d feminise you, I’d look in your eyes and know you were a man and then I’d put you in pretty dresses and heels to make it worse. My male denial slut trapped in a woman’s body, I’d not run away from it, I’d embrace it, because you’re special, and I like it and I want to deny you till you break.

Because you know what, I’m meaner and crueller to guys than I ever am to girls. You’d be so fucked.

(I REALLY hope that fantasy has some positives for you or I’m a complete shit…)

To move it away from the sexual and denial side, I think the key with any dysphoria is to choose to stop hating parts of yourself. It IS you, as you reach down between your legs we want to stop you feeling that sense of disgust, and move it to a point where, while you won’t like it, you don’t hate it. Because if it’s hate then that’s ALL you will be thinking about, and we need to get on with life as we are, no matter how things may change in the future.

It’s all too easy to waste our lives thinking ‘if only this was different everything would be great’. It’s bullshit, everything is great because we decide, here and now, to believe that. If we pin it on some future event we condemn ourselves to not feeling great now.

So forcing yourself to think things like ‘I don’t like this but it’s how I am and I love me’, and ‘Other people love this, I don’t like it but I don’t hate it’, and even ‘I am beautiful, just the way I am’ might just help take the extreme edge off your dysphoria and let you have more fun with sex and denial.

Just to note, this all applies to EVERYONE who doesn’t like part of their body. Choose today to not let it bother you so much and focus on the bits you do like, it’s so freeing. (I know it’s not that easy but we all have to start somewhere).

So Jordan, I hope some of the other ideas above might be useful in just giving you a fantasy space you can also escape to that will reconcile how you feel with what your body had given you. Learn to love yourself more, have some fun with whatever fantasies you find help, and I think you’ll be setting yourself on a very positive path.

Horizon, the BBC’s long running serious documentary show had an extraordinary programme just last night on the latest in the medical side of it all. For those who can access iPlayer:


On the chest binding thing, be careful with that, we don’t want you passing out only to be found in flagrante delicto… The obvious answer is, don’t cum or keep the binding looser… but I hope some of the ideas above will give you a new perspective to explore on your situation and at least some of them will help overcome at least in part the dysphoria. You’re awesome.



(PS Thanks to Kai, my intersex friend for his expert advice on the above!)

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