Archive for : April, 2015

Guided masturbation – an orgasm denial task

Hello everyone, and especially all my new followers (which is basically all of you!).

On a recent post I mentioned  the idea of Guided Masturbation. Why would you need that? I hear some of you ask, you know how to masturbate you’ve been doing it since (fill in age here).

Look, this isn’t to say you’re doing it wrong, per se, just as with many things, you may well have got stuck in a rut (pun not intended).

Letting someone else tell you how to do it can not only inspire new ideas, but it’s also pretty hot to imagine someone else controlling you. This has turned out to be quite long so I’ll post it in parts.

Imagine your fingers are someone else’s or that you’re being controlled somehow, your fingers, agents of another’s will, teasing you, enjoying you, masturbating you.

Easy as it would be to rush through this, try and take your time if you have it, if I were whispering these words in your ear (one of my favourite pasttimes) I’d make you take about an hour to do the following task.

You can, or course, orgasm at the end of this if you so wish, but given this is a blog about female orgasm denial, that isn’t the happy ending you’ll be getting in this particular story. You love it.

A note on vibrators
This is going to assume you have some kind of vibe, if you don’t, you really should invest in one, just a cheap little bullet vibe or egg. Lovehoney is best if you can shop online, otherwise find an Ann Summers if you’re UK like me.  If you can’t risk that then electric toothbrushes are your friend or there’s even smartphone apps (I offer no warranty for water damage) … and otherwise, just use your fingers, it’s why God made arms the length they are!

Let’s begin

Get yourself somewhere comfortable, a bed, or sofa, somewhere you feel relaxed and comfortable. Start clothed – this is all about the tease and anything you wear can help us with that. You don’t really need a bra for this, if you have one on, lose it at an appropriate moment.  You should have a couple of layers covering your mound, so panties plus trousers (pants) or a skirt (preferable to a dress as you’ll see, but just adapt).

So first, the rules…

  1. No cumming without permission
  2. No touching anywhere you’re not told to

Centring yourself

So to start with I want you to take a moment to really become much more aware of your body. Lie there, with your hands on your tummy, and read through this part as you try it.

I want you think about your toes, become very concious of them, how they feel, wiggle them, let your thoughts move up your feet, your ankles, calves to your knees, bend them just a little, open your legs a bit, let your thoughts move up your thighs, to your mons, your pussy lips, become very aware of them, the fabric covering you, how it feels from your waist down, under, through your legs, to your back. As you part your legs a little more feel your lips touching each other, perhaps you can feel them open just a little.

Then move your thoughts up, the weight of your hands on your tummy, those fingers that soon will be doing just what they are instructed, but not yet…

And then your breasts, I don’t care what you think of them, your breasts are amazing; no matter what they are like, there are thousands, perhaps millions of men who would do anything just to see them, let alone touch them, and you get to play with them as much as you want. Lucky girl.

Become aware of them now, again the fabric cupping them, your nipples, moving every so slightly against it as you breath. Take a deep breath, feel it move more. A few more deep breaths, feel your whole body relax as you breathe out each time. 

Now you’ve done it with your eyes open, do it with your eyes shut.

Now we’re going to do it one more time, but this time your fingers are going to trace where your mind is thinking – to start bring your knees up and spread them a little, feet flat on the surface you’re lying on. Start with your knees, then trace down your thighs, when you get to your mound, lightly stroke it, and your breasts, cup and squeeze them gently. 

Good, you should feel relaxed and very aware of your body now.

If you’re wearing a bra now’s a good time to take it off, ideally you want one layer of clothes covering your breasts.

Breast play

Even if it’s quick, I’ll often start a woman masturbating by playing with her breasts. Not only does it act for many like a starter engine for your pussy, but it reminds you that masturbation and denial are not just about that little area between your thighs, but your whole body. 

You are sex. It’s why you exist; evolution, God, whatever you believe, there’s no denying you are made for sex. It’s where your life started. Fucking gave you life. Your whole body is designed to give, and receive pleasure, that beautiful, moistening pussy between your legs is designed to give and receive pleasure, so let’s practice now.

Slide your hands down to cup your breasts, through your top. Gently squeeze them and begin to run your fingers over them, spiral your fingers closer to your nipples and focus playing there until they are starting to get hard. Run your finger tips gently back and forth over them like you were filing your nails.

Go back to cupping them through your top and catch them between your finger and thumb, squeeze them gently for the first time, roll them between your fingers, feel them respond. But more importantly, feel the response between your legs. Your nipples are connnected there, every time you pull on them, squeeze them, rub them it’s making you want to touch your clit, finger your pussy, even more. 

But you can’t, not yet.

Focus on your nipples, is it frustrating to not touch them directly? Good. Pinch them through your top again and this time, start tugging on them. Pinch them harder now, as hard as feels good. And then pull, pull until your fingers slip off your nipples, ‘milking’ them through your top. Feel the fabric dragged over them, the desire to touch your skin and not have your top in the way… and the ache between your legs grow. 

Now bunch up your top at its base, and drag it up, right to your nipples, and pull that hem up and down over your breasts, over your nipples. Up and down, only the fabric pulling at them. Did you ever want to touch your breasts so much?

You can now. Slide your hands onto your bare skin for the first time and feel them, appreciate them, play with them. Run your fingertips lightly over your breasts, again, start to work towards your nipples, savour the fact you can touch them directly now, how good that feels. Begin to rub them, pinch them, pull them. Do it for as long as you can until the ache, the need between your legs grows too great.

Coming in part 2 – going down…

Says it all really…

‘Not yet baby, not yet. Maybe tomorrow, we’ll see’

The little white thong he’d chosen for her to wear on Monday had been a bit tame compared to his usual choices, and she’d been a bit surprised he didn’t want her her naked in bed like normal, but perhaps it was the fact the panties were so wet from her edging that he liked. especially as she’d had to do them all through them.

It was only on Tuesday when she asked what she was to wear and the reply came back, ‘You’re already wearing them’ that she knew she was in trouble.

Five days later, stinking of sex and constantly aroused but dismayed at the mess between her legs she took a bath, he had only said she couldn’t shower with them on.

She loved getting the better of him while sticking to the rules. Although she was pretty sure that  as a result she wouldn’t be cumming in the foreseeable future.




Original picture from picslutwhore

Get an old bra and cut holes just big enough for your nipples to pass through. Put on a top over it and spend the day like it with your nipples rubbing against yoru top.

To make it a little more challenging, lightly tie strong around your nipples, not tight enough to cut off the blood flow but enough to keep them pronounced to further irritate them.

I do love this idea and have often done it, but OMG I can’t watch this video without wincing. The way to do this without possibly cutting your nipples off is to use a marker pen to mark the spot and then cut the holes when the bra is removed!

She lay there helplessly, she was so weary from the entire day of being edged, teased, denied. He’d carried her to the bed an hour ago, and slowly undressed her, taking the massage oil and rubbing it into her entire, aching body.

But slowly, he’d focused his efforts, his fingers lingering more and more between her legs, slipping in and out of her in a way that made her want to sob with desire. And then, just her clit, nothing but that now, twenty minutes of masturbating her so far, and he showed no inclination of stopping. 

How did he know, just when to slow down? Or to pinch harder to stop the edge slipping over. She didn’t care anymore, nothing mattered, nothing existed, apart from that desperate unmet need, the ache, and his fingers.

The piercing he’d wanted her to get had taken two weeks to heal, two weeks where she wasn’t allowed to touch herself except to clean it. He’d known that but failed to mention it until it was done. 

And now, her reward, the first touch down there in a fortnight, his tongue, slowly at first then building, rubbing that little stud back and forth against her hyper-sensitive clitoris. 

He knew she thought he’d allow her to cum, he smiled as his tongue flicked up and down so teasingly. She was wrong.

‘You think you’re ready? Up on the table then, and spread your legs, let me see’
He slowly undid his jeans and let her watch his hard cock spring out, smiling to himself as he knew what was coming. He deliberately let the head of his cock slide along her inner thigh and come to rest at the entrance to her already swollen pussy. She’s been working it well, perhaps I should just let her have it but then he smiled to himself, no, she doesn’t want it that easy. 

He leaned forwards looking as though he was about to thrust himself inside her, enjoying the look on her eyes of anticipation, and then, he slide his hand down and, pushing his cock out of the way, and slipping his two middle fingers inside her he relished the look of frustration and knew he’d made the right choice.

‘Hmmm, nope, not quite ready. Give me 20 more edges and come back when you’re done. Make them hard ones, princess, I’m getting tired of waiting’

He wiped his fingers off on her thigh and bit his lip to stop the smile as he noticed a tear trickle from the corner of her eye. Zipping his cock away he knew it would be worth the wait. He handed her the vibe back and a set of extra batteries. ‘You’ll be needing these, princess’.

So glad to see another female denial blog! If I may ask about your experiences, how long do you usually keep your subs denied for? Do you find that, if the denial goes for too long, the frustration and need dies down a little?

Thank you, it’s lovely to be here. I can’t believe how many followers I’ve picked up in just a couple of days! 

In answer to your question it varies entirely according to the sub. 

However if they are new to it there’s a definite pattern I try to follow as I introduce the concept. First I introduce it through some ‘guided masturbation’, simply a written or spoken play time where instead of masturbating the way you’re used to, you do it the way I tell you. And as part of that, just within that session, we’ll edge, talk about edging, and do it repeatedly before finally cumming. The scene is set.

The next play time I’ll suggest we try seeing how just edging and not cumming makes her feel, and that we’ll let her climax later in the day, probably…

Assuming that goes well we’ll try doing it for a day, and I’ll often either maintain contact to make it a very intimate, guided day of denial – it will include quite a few edges to keep her topped up. 

And then, the most important one.For me there is a critical moment that occurs about three days into denial. It’s the point where a woman will often find she stops fighting the annoyance of not orgasming and starts to embrace the craving as a pleasure in itself. It becomes somewhat euphoric, I’ve sometimes described it as almost spiritual, a transcendental moment. 

I’ve seen it again and again, make it to three days and something magic happens.

So in a way that’s addressing the second part of your question. The frustration can ebb even after a few days, however the need tends to remain strong for some time after that, and the frustration has actually been replaced with something more… profound.

So, getting back to your first question, once that barrier of threeish days been broken, really the world is your oyster and it’s just a case of how long we want to keep your pearl in a state of denial!

I’m personally not a huge fan of ridiculously long denial periods. Very simply because I love giving orgasms too, denial is a two edged sword for me, which in some ways adds to the pleasure of it, when I impose it on a women it costs me something too. There’s also an element that if you go for too long you can forget just what you’re missing, and a big part of the pleasure for me is the glorious agony of choosing the harder path of denial, and for that to be at it’s strongest, the joy of a climax must still echo in a woman’s mind.

So, on average, I’d deny a woman for between 4 and 10 days if she were just interested in it but it wasn’t an overwhelming kink. That’s more than enough to really experience it.

For those whom it’s a really foundational fetish we are talking periods of three or four weeks and beyond. The longest I’ve denied a woman is 50 days, however my collared sub, Elle, is desperate to beat that, partly because she’s a competitive little slut, and also because it’s a hugely deeply rooted desire in her which brings us both great joy. But I’ll talk more about her another time.

So yes, to your second question, for many if it goes on too long it can definitely have a deleterious effect. It’s very individual to each woman though, and part of the fun is figuring out what works best for everyone. As a dom though, there’s a real issue of if the denial is the basis for my relationship with a sub then if it goes on too long I simply get bored. 

There’s also a physical effect that sometimes occurs that if you’ve been denied a very long time, counter to expectations, your first orgasm is very underwhelming, which can be a HUGE disappointment. So that’s worth knowing if you do ever go a long time. It seems as though the constant edging and denial trains your body to not orgasm. It’s very easily fixed with a few more orgasms, and not a rule, but just a possibility.