Hi, I was looking for posts about blue beans because I think that my left ovary is rebelling about my edging so I tried to use the search function. While the page is loading (we have really, really slow internet in my country), The search button (or what I like to call as Internet Sherlock, or I.S.) is clearly visible. However, when the page loaded, I.S. pulled a Houdini and disappeared. I tried to summon my inner detective but, sadly, I couldn’t find a trace of I.S., not even a scroll bar below

I’d really like to find I.S. I’ve never used him before but I really liked his silent support for me, comforting me and telling me that he’ll be there for me. Thank you for your time and I hope he isn’t missing forever, I’d mourn him 

Is this the longest possible way of saying my search function is broken? There’s only one possible response:

No one calls it ‘Internet Sherlock’ – literally, no one. Don’t give things names no one uses, people will have no idea what you’re talking about. 

Especially when you’ve picked the acronym of a major terrorist organisation.

As for your inner detective, maybe it can do something with this:

http://female-orgasm-denial.tumblr.com/search/search+term+here

Some way to go, Watson.