Well, you’re asking the author of a denial blog so I’ll keep most of my suggestions oriented that way

  • talk to each other, spend some time in bed, touching, connecting, and then ask, ‘What kind of things would you like to do in bed, or anywhere else, with me? What are your fantasies?’ And then share yours too.
  • watch some porn together, go to somewhere like the porn hub categories page and take turns picking and watching something you like and explain why, if you can, something turns you on
  • you try denial, getting him to deny you. It can really turn a guy on if you can get it into his head that it’s sexy.
    ‘I read about this whole idea of you keeping me horny but not letting me cum, I thought that sounded fun. Want to try? I guess it’ll make me want to do all sorts of things to you, would you like that?’
  • try denying each other – the easiest way is to start playing in the morning, both get into it, and then say ‘Oh I’m so horny, shall we not cum and stay this way till tonight?’
    Then the rest of the day just keep teasing and touching each other, even give him a blow job at some point but not to completion
    And then that night, let the fireworks commence!
  • try the 30 day challenge where you determine to have sex of some kind every day for 30 days
  • change location, different room, different times, go away for a weekend, try outdoors
  • get romantic, make time for a nice meal, a good movie and then sex where each has it’s own space
  • and then toys…

So yes, i love toys, and they can be great fun to add some spice. 

My absolutely favourite store is Lovehoney – it’s probably the best sex toy site online and the reviews and videos are so helpful.

The first thing to buy is SILICON LUBE. It’s awesome. Just buy some, trust me. Makes sex, handjobs, everything, so slippery and yummy. I recommend Gun Oil lube, the pure silicon one, not waterbased.

Next look at a nice little vibe, the Rocks Off range are brilliant, get a multifunction one for about £12 and if you love it buy the USB chargable one for £40

Consider some simple cock rings for him, they can give really new sensations, and keep him very hard. Just cheap stretchy ones, the’ll break but you get the idea.

Next most used item in my house would be velcro restraints and a blindfold. Just so useful for instant bondage, we keep them permanently tied and tucked down behind the bed.

Next you might want some insertables. A dildo is very dependent on how you have sex, it might be great, or not used much apart from solo play. A butt plug is probably a better bet. Do not get one that it too small or it just falls out all the time and is useless. A nice medium sized silicon plug is best.

Other than that see what’s popular and have fun shopping together for stuff. Remember you can’t use silicon lube with silicon toys though, so just watch that. Have some waterbased stuff too for use with toys.

Hope that helps!


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