Tag : denial-switch

I consider myself more a denial switch leaning towards denial slut, but there is something so satisfying about cumming while playing cals curse as he tells me I can’t, knowing all the other sluts unable to orgasm even days after listening. Dont worry little sluts, I’m putting your stolen orgasms to good use

I like you already.

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Hi, I’m usually what you’ve been lately calling denial bitch. But a few days ago I decided to explore a little bit the other end of the rope. I basically prepared all my favorite porn, and I thought: what if I try to keep it for an hour? Just getting on the edge and coming back before starting again. After the hour I was proud of myself, but when I finally allowed mysef I was also kinda sad? Being horny is much more fun. I want to try stopping completly one day but I am scared. Thoughts?

Let’s just repeat my mantra, altogether now:

Cumming is good, but not cumming is better

It’s all good, don’t be sad. The fact you edged for an hour is brilliant, and you SHOULD be proud. Being horny really is much more fun and that’s the realisation you begin to have, yes it feels amazing for a few seconds, but denial keeps you feeling really good for hours or days or weeks.

But you don’t have to go from zero to denial hero in one fell swoop. Try it, for half a day, edge, then stop, don’t cum. See how it makes you feel and reward yourself with an orgasm later.

This is JUST as valid an enjoyment of denial as it is not cumming for weeks on end. I’m a total denial egalitarian, minutes or months, all are celebrated here.

Honestly, the BDSM scene can be amazing judgemental. They love putting labels on things and telling you what’s right and what isn’t. My belief is firmly that as long as you’re having fun, and being safe and consensual, then just go with whatever floats your boats and be happy about it!.

The only thing I highly encourage is that you try new things, because life is too short to be just stuck in a rut with no new experiences. But the reason we try new things is to see if it’s better than the old thing, and if it isn’t, go back to the old way, or mix it up sometimes just because you can and variety is definitely the spice of sex.

So don’t be scared, sweetie. Give it a go, if you try it, you’ll like it…

So, here’s the thing: I love reading your blog and seeing all the instructions you give to girls and cumming as I imagine them begging, so I do *know* I’m what you’d call a denial bitch. But when I’m with a partner I love that they give me permission to cum, but I just don’t get excited at the thought of them not letting me finish. And I generally don’t really care about labels but I do wonder, is this also considered “denial” or is it just a fetish or whatever? What do you think? -Lena

Hey Lena, 

I don’t care for labels much either, whatever works for you is brilliant and don’t let anyone else tell you otherwise. 

But go with ‘denial switch’ as a good name if you do want it, ‘switch’ covers a multitude of sins (I should know). 

Generally loving permission to cum is more about submission than anything, but ask them sometime to properly deny you, tie you up first, really go to work. While you don’t like the idea now, just having a good experience of it once can make you realise how hot it can be. And if it still doesn’t do it for you, that’s totally okay! 

Oh and absolutely indulge that denial bitch side by returning the favour to your partner! Edging someone can be an incredibly intimate and sexy experience to share together. It’s a gateway to them being open to share things they desire they would normally keep to themselves, which can be very enlightening.

But as my wife and I like to practise, we’ll ‘try anything twice’ when it comes to kink that one of us is curious about (once sometimes isn’t enough to be sure as you don’t know what you’re doing the first time).