Wow. First day in nearly a month that I’m not a complete horny wreck? Not counting the beginning of the day… Of course finally being able to cum was amazing. Everything was a lot more intense than I had expected, though. When you said that you thought I was holding myself back, you were right. I know that’s not the first time we’ve Skyped, but it was my first time with toys, and it was my first time cumming. While I loved camming (A bit too much, actually, lol) it was nerve wracking. And look at you, being all sneaky and not bringing it up until I’m dripping, desperate to cum. Whether or not that was your plan, it obviously worked. Still, it’s something that I’ll just need to time to adjust to, as with most things.

While physically, it was obviously amazing, mentally…I’m not so sure. If I’m being truthful, finally being allowed to cum (or should I just say ‘finally cumming’?) helped me to realize how much I actually love denial. And now that that’s gone, I crave it. I want to be all wet, achy, and needy again, despite how miserable I was at times. Perhaps I liked denial before, but now, seeing both sides of it, I actually prefer it? I know, it sounds preposterous (please still let me cum…I still like that too.)

Okay, the ‘drop’ afterwards kind of freaked me out. Just a little bit. It was pretty horrible, and even thinking about it now is fairly depressing. It wasn’t something that I was expecting, but, with a little potassium, and some nice conversation, I was feeling better. Side note – Are you serious about shoving fruit in me if I don’t start eating it? o.e Scary.

Buying $200 worth of lingerie was not originally my plan today, but I’m so excited. BUT…It’s shipping through USPS again. Only this time, it’s under 2 day shipping, so I’ll probably see it in about a month. 🙂 It seems almost ridiculous that I’m buying these things. It’s so far outside of what I would normally do, but I suppose it’s refreshing to be doing all these new things.

Hm…Not much else. I really like that vibe. I really like the dildo. I’m really nervous about all the other toys that have thus far remained untouched. 😡

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