When Snowflake ordered her sex toys from Lovehoney she decided to not pay for expedited delivery. Given the wonders of the US postal system I thought it would be amusing to tell her that she couldn’t cum until the toys arrived.

Needless to say, USPS delivered (or didn’t… depending on your perspective).

When you made some comment about my orgasm relying on USPS, I didn’t think much of it. SILLY ME. I didn’t know it was possible to be so irritated and horny at the same time. I am so fucked…USPS is such shit. God, it was just horrific. I edged over and over and over again, turning myself into a dripping mess. But, it was okay, because I knew I was finally going to cum later. When I opened that mailbox and saw nothing…I almost started crying. My cunt was still dripping all over my thighs, clit still swollen. But, no. Whatever, I’m sure you loved it. >_>

Anyways, someone was feeling rather vocal today, eh? And by someone, I mean you. Fuck, I swear, sometimes you’re relentless. Besides it being insanely hot, it brought back a lot of memories I thought I had long since repressed (I’ll tell you about it when I don’t feel like ripping my head or pussy off../out.) Cleaning the stairs was really hot, only thing that could have made it better was stockings…Fucking USPS. It was strange, as generally I think of myself as clumsy and awkward, and tend to feel that way when doing anything of any kind of sexual nature, but not that time. The carpet was digging into my bare knees, and I knew that if someone walked by, they would easily be able to look through the gap in my drapes and see my bare ass bent over the stairs. Yeah, it was pretty hot. Yet the entire time, I was wishing that there was some way to take a picture for you. Too bad.

I’ve read several fantasies where girls wanted to essentially lose the ability to cum. For a split second today, I understood it, but probably not for the same reasons. When I was edging over and over again today, I wanted to lose that ability to come. I knew that you weren’t going to let me cum, but it was horrible every time I had to tear my fingers away from my clit, when I was so close. I thought that it would be amazing if I wasn’t able to cum, and instead, could sit there riding that edge for hours. THEN I had the thought that maybe, just maybe, I didn’t need to cum, and I could just live with edging for the rest of my life. Of course then I did actually rip my fingers away, came to my senses, and realized that’s crazy, because I love cumming (I think…What does it feel like? Remind me? :P)

I’m so torn. I’m so horny, and I want to play with myself, but I know that will only make it worse, since I’m not allowed to cum. You have me caught in a rather vicious cycle. However, it’s crazy how differently I’m thinking. When I first started talking to you, I told a friend that I had started experimenting with denial. When I complained to him that I wanted to cum, he asked me, “Why don’t you just cum then?” That keeps on popping back into my mind, and it still confuses me. If I want it so badly, why am I not doing it? It’s hard to accept that I could actually love denial more than cumming, even though that may be the case. Is it that I don’t want to disappoint you? I don’t know. I’m really not sure how I even got to a place where I’m so willing to please you. A place where coming – actually coming, not ruining, isn’t even an option. It’s not something that I would consider. Even if it was ruining, I would have to slip over the edge, I wouldn’t do it on purpose. So, I’m left here pondering how exactly you got me to a place like this. Doing all of these things that seemed so unlike me only a few weeks ago. It’s amazing how ones perspective can change so quickly…

A side note: I played piano today. For like an hour. Okay, just wanted to add that. 🙂

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