I think it’s a big girl problem, but that aside…

Your period doesn’t have to stop you exploring denial. If you suffer badly from cramps when Aunt Flo comes to visit it may totally put you off anything down there, but actually a fair proportion of denial sluts have told me edging helps ease their suffering during Shark Week (however others yell and tell me it makes it worse so try at your own risk).

Using a tampon is usually much better than a pad if you do want to edge while surfing the crimson wave. That would let you hump your pillow to your heart’s content. Whichever you use, just be prepared for it to fill up faster if you’re diddling yourself while the painters are in. 

Then again, maybe you should take the opportunity to go anal only for the week.

I’ll leave this here:

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