Disclaimer: I’m tired as hell right now so this post is probably riddled with typos.

Fuck. I need to cum. I need to cum so fucking bad right now. I got talked into hard edging with no ruin tonight and I’m going insane! There’s this constant throb in my cunt like it’s determined to break my will.

I tried to sleep but I just couldn’t. My mind was constantly drawn back to my pussy. I started to think about all the other denial sluts out there tonight and how their pussies must be aching. I just wanted to shove my hands under the blankets and cum so fucking hard. And then I started to wonder whether I might accidentally cum in a dream and whether that would count. After thinking for a while I decided that it would only count if my pussy actually came in real life. Like if it actually started clenching at the same time as the dream orgasm. And I’m proud to say that this thought led me down the filthiest research trail I could ever have imagined.

I wondered whether your pussy actually does cum when you cum in a dream. It sounds plausible enough; guys definitely do cum when they have wet dreams (or “nocturnal emissions”) – hence the name. So can girls have proper wet dreams?

I googled “Female nocturnal emission” and to my surprise there were some solid results! A wikipedia page led me to a study performed on a girl who was able to reliably induce lucid dreaming and would often create sexual encounters in her dreams that brought her to orgasm. What follows, ladies and gentlemen, is the abstract for that study, in full. It is without a doubt the hottest piece of scientific literature I have ever read. My pussy was screaming to cum as I read it:

Since women report more orgasms in dreams than men do, we began with a female subject. We recorded many different aspects of her physiology that would normally be affected by sexual arousal, including respiration, heart rate, vaginal muscle tone, and vaginal pulse amplitude. The experiment called for her to make specific eye movement signals at the following points: when she realized she is dreaming, when she began sexual activity (in the dream), and when she experienced orgasm. She reported a lucid dream in which she carried out the experimental task exactly as agreed upon. Our analysis revealed significant correspondences between the dream activities she reported and all but one of the physiological measures. During the fifteen-second section of her physiological record which she signaled as the moment of orgasm, her vaginal muscle activity, vaginal pulse amplitude, and respiration rate reached their highest values of the night, and they also were considerably elevated in comparison to the rest of the REM period. Contrary to expectation, heart rate increased only slightly.

— LaBerge, S., Greenleaf, W., & Kedzierski, B. (1983). Physiological responses to dreamed sexual activity during lucid REM sleep. Psychophysiology, 20, 454-455.

So their you have it ladies. When we orgasm in dreams, our pussies do actually cum.

I wasn’t done yet though. I though back to all the desperate denial sluts and I wondered if any of them had unknowingly broken their denial by cumming whilst asleep. And I started to wonder if their were any pussies out there right now, cumming whilst their owner dreams dark, delicious fantasies.

So back to wikipedia I went, and I found these stats:

In 1953, sex researcher Alfred Kinsey found that nearly 40% of the women he interviewed have had one or more nocturnal orgasms or wet dreams. Those who reported experiencing these said that they usually had them several times a year and that they first occurred as early as thirteen, and usually by the age of 21

Well, for the sake of keeping this family friendly let’s take that 21 years as a cut-off. So 40% of women over that age have “several” wet dreams a year. Well I’d say I have maybe 4 a year (that I remember) and that seems to fit so let’s use that in lieu of any actual data.

So now we need the world population over 21, I couldn’t find that but I there’s data for 24 and up so we’ll use that. For women, that comes out at 2,163,000,000 (Source: World Demographics Profile).

So now we can take our 40% of that to get the number of women who experience wet dreams. That’s 865,200,000. Multiply that by 4 and you have the number of times it happens, 3,460,800,000. That’s nearly three and a half billion wet dreams a year. Fuck.

So lastly we divide that number by an appropriate interval. 3.5 billion is a lot, so let’s go with the smallest we can get away with – seconds. There are 365 days in a year, 24 hours in a day, 60 minutes in an hour and 60 seconds in a minute. Multiply that all together and you get 31,500,000 seconds in a year. We’re almost there now.

We just have to divide our number of wet dreams by the number of seconds in a year, round to the nearest whole number, and we get a statistic which made me want to cum more than anything in the world when it popped up on my calculator.

Right now, as you read this, 110 girls are cumming in their sleep every second.

I really hope I’m not one of them.

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