I’d love to. In fact there are some good ones buried in this blog too. But first I want you both to try something. I want you to take turns, masturbating yourself, with the other snuggled up close to you, watching and learning from what you do. Lie on your bed next to each other, spend some time semi-clothed, kissing, touching, but nothing too intense. (If this is long distance you can do it on cam instead).
Then you’re to start, he can kind of play with himself a bit but the focus is you, watching what you do with your hands to your breasts and pussy. Tell him what feels good, encourage him to ask questions. Don’t hurry, take it at your normal pace. Explain what it’s like to get closer and closer, what you think about to get most aroused, explain about edging.
Then, when you’re right on the edge, you have to ask him if you’re allowed to cum.
He’s to say ‘no’. Explain beforehand, no matter how much you beg, you really want him to say no. He might let you cum later, maybe…
Then it’s his turn. You watching him. I bet he wanks much differently from how you play with him. Try playing with his nipples while he wanks (he probably doesn’t do that to himself but for some guys it’s amazing).
See if he can edge too, keeping himself really close – it’s not a thing a lot of guys do but it’s amazing if he can.
Then, because you’re a good little cum slut, get down there and let him cum into your open mouth. Head lying on his tummy like a pillow is one option, or switch to full on porn star kneeling by the side of the bed. Not a BJ, no, watch him finish, and spurt into your mouth. And yes, swallow, because it’s insanely hot. Plus you’re edged and denied and you’ll really want to at this point. Plus if he’s a really kinky bastard go and kiss with his cum in your mouth (so hot).
Now it’s his turn to play with you, as you both discuss what you learnt from watching each other. And again, when you get close, you ask to cum. This time it’s up to him, but we all know you secretly hope he denies you, don’t we?
As for masturbation instructions, I’ve written three ‘Guided masturbation’ posts which I’m sure he’ll get lots of idea from:
Part 1: An intro and breast play
Part 2 Proper masturbation
Part 3: Senses and toys
In terms of tips for giving instructions:
- Keep communicating, he’s not psychic, so tell him what feels good and doesn’t
- Sometimes tell him what you want but give him a chance to make it up too – you can discuss afterwards what you liked best
- Use the intimacy of it to open up to each other, when you’re edging get him to ask you about fantasies, or have him tell you some
- It’s all about the tease, getting you close then moving your hands away to other parts of you, until you’re desperate for more.
- Involve toys or finger fucking as you find you enjoy it
- Kiss a lot
- Move to oral, if he doesn’t go down on you much it’s time for him to learn
- Explore ruined orgasms as part of masturbation and denial play, they’re awesome
- Try BOTH not cumming and see how much fun mutual denial can be
- Make some noise, unless you have to be silent, making some moans both turns him on AND is quite empowering and releasing for you
- Have fun, don’t take any of this too seriously. If you’re not laughing sometimes while doing this together, you’re doing it wrong!
Feel free to get him to message me or send me an ask, I’m more than happy to help people deny their partners and give any advice I can!