I understand, having someone to be accountable to, or even any motivation outside of yourself (like a competition or collaborative effort) can really change your commitment to it. That’s partly the fact you’re probably submissive, but it’s just a basic human dynamic that we are motivated doing things with and for others – just look at exercise classes or running clubs or competitive sports.
So the obvious, but difficult answer is to find someone to be accountable to. Difficult because finding a dominant partner is hard enough, convincing them to not let you cum is even harder.
One of the early obvious results from the survey I’ve just started is the demand for more tasks/competitions/events that people can join in with regularly and have that sense of being denied for and with others. So that’s definitely something we’ll do more of.
One of the girls I have the pleasure of denying has actually got a little group of friends she shares it with! Yep, they all talk about it and participate – how awesome is that?! SO yeah… any really good friends you might broach it with? ‘So have you heard about this orgasm denial fad… apparently everyone’s talking about it’ nudge nudge.
Quite seriously though, the fact this blog is now first on Google when you search for ‘female orgasm denial’ actually makes this a viable strategy. As they’re going to go Google it, find themselves here, and boom – you suddenly have a denial buddy!
I know it’s not what everyone would want, but wouldn’t that be kind of cool to actually make a guy’s input into your denial much more of an optional thing? Little rivalries between friends to see who can edge the most over a weekend. Secret trips, not to buy booze, but vibrators… A brave new denied world.
So, rambling dreams aside, let me just add, don’t get too disappointed. This is most of all supposed to be fun. Just keep trying! Because if you cum, or if you hold off, it feels great either way.