I’d like your opinion, James– When I was a preteenager, I masturbated a *lot* without knowing what it was. I even edged without knowing that was what I was doing. The method I used was sitting on my hand and rubbing, sometimes so often that my clit would be sore for days. Now I’m 22, and neither I nor anyone else has been able to make me physically aroused in years. Could I have physically fucked something up with all that rubbing? It’s not just that I can’t come, I never feel ANYTHING.

Thank you for sending this in, (sorry for the slow reply). How we start with sex is so interesting, isn’t it? I remember getting my early kicks at about five years old riding my bike down a cobbled road. Had no idea why it felt so good but it’s probably to blame for all the rest of this shit.

As for if you’re damaged, I don’t know.

There’s a thing guy’s do to their cocks called banding that cuts off feeling to it (and is really dangerous, avoid!) so, yes, I guess it’s possible. But I’m not a doctor.

Arousal is far more than physical though, it’s a really complex mix of mind and body. So, even if you can’t get off by rubbing because your have damaged your clit, playing with your nipples or pussy or other erogenous zones should be getting a physical response.

I’d suggest:

1. Try following my masturbation instructions and see if that gets you aroused by involving more of your body
2. Get a vibe and try it on your clit as part of this and see if that’s different from just rubbing with your fingers
3. If that’s not doing anything for you (or you want more) go and see your doctor and simply tell them you aren’t getting aroused from clitoral stimulation and see what they recommend. Yes, talking to doctors can be embarrassing, GET OVER IT. They train forever to be able to help and trust me, your problem is WAY more interesting than Mrs Higgins dodgy knee.

Alternatively, of course, you could just decide you want to be kept Brand New in Box… If you read that blog and get wet, I think we can conclude you are truly fucked.