Denial with a partner who tells you not to cum VS denial you do yourself are two completely different things. With a partner it’s all about the control they have over you, with yourself it’s about the self control. I’m terrible at edging when I’m allowed to cum, I just let myself cum after one edge, simply because I want it (I’m talking about the days where I’m allowed to cum as much as I want, when I’ve been a very very good girl and James wants to reward me). But when I’m not allowed to cum I can’t. I can slip over, but those are accidents (and I got better at it already). I can’t let myself have a full orgasm without permission from James. Not because I have the self control to stop, but because cumming without permission would be horrible for me. I’d hate it so much, and I would instantly regret it.

Anyway, here are a few tips:

  1. Don’t get too close, simply because the need to go over isn’t so strong then. Just float a bit under the edge, but don’t go directly to the edge. It will probably need a bit of practice, but that’s okay. 
  2. Just try edging as a way to make your orgasm even stronger. Let yourself cum at the end, and stop feeling bad about it. I promise, it will be worth to do those few edges, the orgasm will be amazing.
  3. Stop feeling bad about cumming, everyone needs to learn, and just trying to jump 2 metres high without training won’t ever work. 
  4. When you learned to edge properly, just try stopping once, fingers away for 10 minutes, and then start again and let yourself cum. Increase those little breaks each time you try this, until you can stop completely and not cum. Maybe you’ll find you love edging and the constant horniness much more than the short release of an orgasm. 

I hope this helped, good luck!

Terrific advice from Diva – she’s getting good at these ask things!

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