Relaxing and practising, those are the two magic ingredients, and thankfully practising helps you relax!

So, when you’re masturbating and edging focus on fingering yourself as part of it, work from one finger to using two and just explore how tight you are and how that changes as you get more confident with it.

In an ideal world you’d also have a dildo you can practise with, so once you’re cool with fingers switch that in – but failing that, a clean, or condom covered hairbrush handle will often do nicely. Play around, discover your gspot, realise that your vagina is awesome and once you’re relaxed it can feel amazing. And when you’ve learnt that by yourself, it’s time to teach him!

What happens when you’re new with sex is even with a lot of foreplay when he tries to put his cock in you, you are nervous and so you tense up, so then he has to push harder, and it hurts, and so you tense up even more. 

A one way trip to painville.

So going nice and slowly, talking to each other, using lube, proper lube, not spit! Yes, even though you’re wet, adding lube makes a WORLD of difference. You can get it cheaply in any drugstore. If your’e embarrassed you can always buy KY Jelly which is like old school lube but newer ones by Durex etc are better. You’re buying condoms anyway, right, right?! Just add some lube at the same time.

The other factor to be taking into account if you haven’t had much sex yet is that pesky hymen maybe still around. If you’re not completely sure what’s going on there (it doesn’t break, it kind of wears away…) watch this amazing video. Actually watch it anyway, it should be mandatory in all schools.

‘I’m making a hyyyymen’ – Gold.

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