Hi James, I just recently discovered denial and decided to try it. I’m starting with just a few days but next week I’d like to try to go the whole week in denial, the only problem I’ve run into is when I slip up and start to cum, even if I stop touching as soon as I feel it start I don’t think I ruin. My pussy clenches on nothing and I make sure not even my thighs rub against my clit but I still feel satisfied when it’s over… what can I do?

Hi Anon,

So ruined orgasms are very variable things. It’s not that uncommon to have a response like you are, that it feels pretty much like a full orgasm.

It might stay like that, but my experience is usually that it’ll change over time – and what helps it most is deliberately ruining your orgasms for a while. If you give yourself a nice (nasty) hard ruin – that is really pushing, and fighting off cumming, especially combined with fucking yourself at the same time, and then as you finally give in and go over, pulling out and stopping all stimulation – then often your body will realise something really fucked up just happened and you’ll discover all the frustration and lack of satisfaction and quick return to horniness that many get with ruins.

Also, trying a few ruins in a row can kick that off too.

It’s like your body learns that a ruin is a thing, and then once it’s learnt, well, there’s no going back… so be careful what you wish for.

It can also be time of the month, or just vary over longer periods. They really are one of the most interesting and variable tools of edging and denial. So don’t be afraid to explore and see what they do for you.

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