Hi Carrie, not too personal at all!

She’s the one who really got me exploring denial as while we were somewhat kinky when we got married (we got married pretty early) I wanted to bring her sex drive up to the level of mine (which is just stupid high) and so denying her was by far the most fun and effective way of doing that.

We’ve got much more flexible it as time’s gone on, we explore mutual denial (so if we’re going away for a dirty weekend we’ll tease the fuck out of each other for at least a week to build up to it, so much fun) and she completely loves locking my cock up and driving me crazy when she’s in the mood. We have four way restraints permanently attached to our bed 😀

As for how our sex life is, pretty damn great. But that’s not always been the case. Like almost any long term relationship it has it’s ups and downs. The first five years of having kids were just brutal on our sex life – we’d be lucky if we got up to anything for weeks at points.

But, thank god, we’re out the other side of that and they’re old enough to not need nearly so much input, and so we’ve worked really hard to get our sex life not just back on track the last few years, but even better.

There was a report just this week on how often people are having sex

We fucking blow that chart out of the water – we’d have sex, of some kind, most days. Now some of those are just some edging, or a quickie, and others are four hour sessions with some seriously kinky shit going on, but denial is still a massive part of that, because it encourages us to be intimate basically every day, and we’re basically like horny teenagers whenever we get the chance.

But it takes ongoing effort, just as important as denial is the fact we have a date night every week, we book regular ‘dirty weekends’ away, we’re both willing to try pretty much anything twice, and we work hard on the romance side too. Plus we take keeping fit seriously as trust me folks, good sex requires you to be fit.

This is why I especially love hearing from couples who are exploring denial, as for us it’s been the lynch-pin of keeping our sex life healthy, happy and varied.

Tease and Denial – the secret ingredient to a happy, kinky marriage.

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