Hi Bri,

Anon is fine, especially when you have a great reason for it. So okay, being denied isn’t always a fix for not cumming easily. It can help but your best long term plan is the two of you having some seriously hands on sessions, where you teach her exactly what gets you off and you spend the whole time communicating till she gets it too. 

As part of that a great way to start is to get yourself really close while she cuddles up and whispers dirty things in your ear, and then just on the edge either she joins in or takes over and makes you cum – once you’ve broken the ‘curse’ that only you can do it it’ll be easier already.

But, you have a month till then so let’s use that. Get a good Edging Routine in place, even if it’s just subtle rubbing I want you trying it, yes even with your roommate there. But NO cumming. We’re going to see what a proper time edging does for you. If you get privacy then you can, at most once every four days, ruin an orgasm.

So, while I like the idea of the surprise, I’m going to suggest an alternative that I think will get you more excited than even the edging. 

Share this together.

Read this blog, figure out an edging routine that would work for you, and then share it with her – ‘How about we both try this until we meet, can you imagine how horny we’ll get?!’ kind of thing.

Talk to each other about what you’re doing, successes, failures. Give each other little dares, compete, just have lots of sexy fun with it!

You can save the fact you hope to cum as an extra surprise, if you manage it. And that way it’s not all focused on that success or failure, but on the much more achievable fun of both being horny little denial sluts. This stuff is great solo, but even more fun with someone. Check the Denial Buddy posts for lots of ideas there.


I hope that’s helpful, Bri. Let us know how you get on!

James x

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