That’s not even v weird, it’s a good question!
I think the dissatisfaction you feel is probably based on the fact that sex, is designed for two to share. And as much as I love masturbation and orgasm denial, if you’re doing it just to yourself you will sometimes feel that need for more, it’s just how we’re wired.
One of the reasons I think orgasm denial is so great is because it opens you up to exploring your body and learning what it’s capable of and what you like. But that’s again mostly towards an end, which is sharing that knowledge with someone else!
Now if you don’t feel ready for a relationship yet, that’s totally cool, but there’s a reason why I drop in regular ‘denial buddy’ stuff in here, Because even if you’re not wanting a sexual relationship, the next step with denial IS to have someone else that you can at least be open and honest and explore discussing how it feels and what you like, and even maybe getting physical with.
There’s a reason a hell of a lot of women have stories of how they fooled around with a best friend when they were young, because it’s a natural next step in discovering the real joy of sex, giving it to someone else.