Hey! A few days ago, I got punished and I had to use my safeword for the first time ever. I still feel bad about it now and it happened like 5 days ago. I feel weak because I didn’t last through the punishment. But it was just too much in that moment. Should I feel bad or is it okay to use it even during a punishment? (Sorry for my bad English btw)

1. Your English is good.

2. It’s more than okay, it’s great. I’m proud of you for doing it, I know it can be hard, but it’s SO important you feel you can use them whenever, in any situation. 

It doesn’t matter if it’s a punishment or just teasing or even simply a mindfuck. Any good dom wants you to use safewords whenever you feel it’s getting close to too much for you or has crossed any kind of line where you don’t feel good or safe any more.

Punishment time is definitely included, and that’s because EVERYTHING you do in a D/s relationship has to be covered by it being consensual – the whole premise of someone else being dominant and you being submissive to them means that a safeword should be in place and usable in all situations. You wouldn’t be punished you weren’t in the D/s context, that’s the reason it’s happening, so consent and thus safewords absolutely apply.

So definitely chat to your dom about it but I can assure you, you did good!

James